So I have learned this afternoon that I should not wander into
just any thread on the forums, cuz I can't keep my big mouth shut try
as I may. Frankly... there is so much garrrrrrbage that calls itself
Christian that it makes me want to vomit... and when I see the remnants
of that filth still clinging to my walk and my life... it makes me even
sicker. It's like having lice or something... you can't kill it... it
itches and itches and irritates and you scratch and scratch and cause
your own infection...
I will never love this world or anything in it more than God!!!
We have no righteousness of our own... we can't even receive a right
spirit from God without eventually screwing it up (am I allowed to say
that... oh well) like I was saying... we are filthy creatures no matter
how hard we try to be like Christ.... it just brings my recent post
back to mind even more vividly...
we gotta die daily and
it's not like that makes us prettier people, it just makes us
consistently stinky.... consequences... reputation... a name for
ourselves... that rotting piece of flesh over there is the lie I told
yesterday... and the thing drawing maggots on the floor is the
condescending look I gave to that cynical college boy last week... it
just piles up around us as we keep cutting off pieces of our self
trying to be free of the yuck...
what was God talking about
cutting stuff off of ourselves? Can it possibly be healthy to sit in
the midst of the decay around us that we have rejected but that remains
a stench in our lives?... I'm thinking out loud again obviously... i
don't know why... it just hits me some days....
... but as
I sit here thinking it thru with you and with the Lord it occurs to me
that cutting the yuck off isn't really what we are told to do... we are
told to sacrifice it. Sacrifice involves the killing, the death, the
stench, but it involves something more as well... it involves the fire.
But what exactly does that mean... what does such a fire look like.
That cleansing flame that takes what we cut off, our sin, our yuck, our
rotting stinkiness... and it burns it up so that the filth and the
stench is once and for all GONE. It is no longer in existence. There is
no lasting haunting disease ridden remains surrounding us and
tormenting us...
We always have the image of that sweet
smelling sacrifice as being the smoke rising upward... but what is it
really that is rising upward to heaven that pleases God so much?...
perhaps it is cleanliness, holiness, the reversal of the evil created
by the only creatures created in the image of God, the only creatures
able to create anything at all, perhaps we are not only full of the
capacity to create good... but also with the capacity to create evil...
could being made in his image and his likeness mean that we
have the capacity to create both... and yet the restraint and power to
turn from such evil... to understand the stench it causes, the
suffering and pain, the ugliness, the torment... perhaps that is the
sweet savor that the Lord is so moved by as he sees us undo the evil
that rests in our hands to breathe life into...
choice...
choosing to burn that bag of drugs in the flame, to give up the power
we hold to make everything and everyone around us bow down to our
lusts, knowing the thrill of the high -- and yet the misery contained
in it... perhaps climbing up on that altar, that sacrifice, that
painful cutting off of something that we love and want and desire, that
stench of death, the ugliness of it all... is actually worth the
opportunity to create goodness... to discard the pleasure it would have
brought us... to avoid the evil it would have created...
When we die to self, it is not enough to just climb on that altar and
kill our flesh piece by piece. It is the fire that is the real key. It
is the complete obliteration of sin and self and sickness and disease.
And what is that fire symbolic of... the Holy Spirit. That is our
power, that is the key to holiness and to living daily under the
authority of the Goodness of God. He comes along side of us to help
us... and as we sacrifice what belongs to us -- our SELF, he chucks it
in the fire of God and burns it up. We offer our SELF to him piece by
piece, chunk by chunk, day by day... and God removes the very existence
of evil as well as it's power over us.
You thought putting
a porn lock on your computer was a small thing, you thought deciding to
not cheat on your spouse was only the right thing to do, you thought
not stretching the truth to hide your own mistake was merely an
inconvenience....
no.
It was so much more. It
was the reversal of the tide, the handing over of SELF and SIN to God.
You had the power and capacity to increase the evil in this world but
you chose to guard what is good instead. It was no small thing. It is
never a small thing to do what is right and good and Godly. People may
never know about it, they may never see the test you passed, they may
never understand the complexity of it all or the intensity of the heat
you faced... but God does. He records it and will bring it up again one
day. He is a rewarder, a proud papa. He will give honor to whom honor
is due.
Humility does stink.
But God walks beside us and burns up the yuck as we hand it over to him on that altar.
As we lay there and die and we let the flames (as painful as they are)
free us from our sin, as we make the choice to lay down our power and
capacity to do evil, and we breathe life into what is good and full of
blessing. That is the moment that we truly reflect our God, when we
take on his image and we fill the heart of our Daddy with overwhelming
Joy. Just imagine what it is like... to overwhelm the Almighty God with
Joy... every time you have resisted the temptation to do evil, you have
pleased Him, you have moved the heart of God.
It is a flame
and a fire that will never be quenched. God (Holy Spirit) is there to
aid us every step of the way thru this world full of yuck, thru the
entire process of ridding ourselves of self daily. And it is the cross
of Christ that fuels that flame. He is our source, our courage to face
the pain, our strength to persevere and not grow weary in choosing to
do good... He is our GREEN energy and power, the only One worthy enough
or able to burn in the flame with us as our example, as our enabler,
leading us to the holiness and wholeness that he has perfected and
called us to. He came to be with us, to show us how to do what God's
holiness requires of us, to show us what it looks like to die daily, to
sacrifice our SELF, to die so that others may live, to fill the world
with goodness and to rid it of evil. Christ became one of us to make a
way for us to get back to what is Good... back to the throne of God...
a way out of the yuck -- and that way is thru the fire...
it's just a matter of following him into the flames to get there.
It can be scary, it can seem impossible, and there is some pain involved
but He will never leave your side, and there's no question that He will get you there
if ur willing to follow Him <3
Hope this makes sense. I just now sat down and typed it out just as it sits here on this screen, minus a few typos. haha.
Thanks for thinking it thru with me. I'm sure there is much that I have
not addressed or even thought of, but perhaps it will inspire you to
finish this conversation with the Lord one to one.
:o)
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