I grew up in a church my whole life i am a pastors daughter. i went to church almost everyday. i had a "relationship" with God everyone envied. so they thought. I had to have a "relationship" with god to make my dad look good i couldn't be a pastors kid and be myself i had to be what everyone thought a pastors daughter should be i had to live up to there standards there expectations. i did dances, sang, everything. but, i felt so empty, so alone. i tried fixing that with everything. Guys,Cutting,Bulimia. nothing worked so i got mad at god i became furious. i would always still go yo church but i would just sit there and be mad at god for 2 years. after about 1 year we got a youth pastor. he was amazing! he helped me out with everything so i thought. about 2 years after he got here my sister, him, a friend [guy] and his wife went to Hawaii. when they got back rumors started and he got mad and my dad got mad they were about my sister so they got into a HUGE fight and he started a website see, i told him everything he was like my counsler. well he started a website and put all of our information on it. my WHOLE family. information about the bad stuff we did, about out sins. so after we found out about that he decided to was going to leave. well, he left and he called me a slut and told me to give up. so thats exactly what i did i mean he had to be right. he was the most important person to me. so i got back into cutting after about 1 year people started noticing they started worrying about me. yeah right they cant possibly care about me is what i remember thinking. so after people started noticing i decided i HAD to stop that i was to obvious. so i started being bulimic agian. and to this day i struggle with it. but, i started going to this youth group and they were so real. i looked at them and how they were and i new this is what i had been looking for my whole life. i wanted to be real, be myself.  so after about 6 months i started getting really close to some poeple and thy started noticing i was really skiiny, skinnier than i should be a girl came up to me and said can i help you, can i be there for you, you're not ALONE. and from there on i started changing or at least wanting to. so, it took me awhile to open up to her FULLY. but, im so glad i did. she has helped me so much get better, and start being real with myself and others. having a relationship with god and knowing the truth through his word. im not saying im fully better but, i have been getting there i am starting couseling. and im ready to change so i can help SAVE this generation help save hearts. well, god never ceases to amaze me and he is always there when i need him all i have to do is call and he will answer. thats my testimony i hope you guys enjoyed and got encouaraged because i want you to know its never to late to change! God will work wonders all you have to do is believe and have faith. and he will never leave you or forsake you.

 

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I also grew up in a very abusive family.  My stepfather abused me verbally and physically all the time.  I knew that he never wanted me, but when he married my mom I was part of the package.  He was an alcoholic and when he was drunk he was satans left hand.  Growing up in elementary school I can remember numerous times he would hit me with his fists, sticks electrical cords or whatever he could find at that time.  One instance stands out more that any other.  I was in 7th grade and I came home with a bad report card.  He told me to go to my room, I new what was coming.  He told me to take off my clothes and lay over the bed.  He went out for a moment and came back in with an electrical cord.  I could see fire in his eyes.  He began hitting me with the cord, the pain was intense.  After awhile the pain seem to disappear.  When he stopped I came back to earth and the pain set in.  My entire body was covered in welts and I was bleeding from most of them.  This all happened on a Friday.  Monday when I went back to school and I forget that it was swim day.  The other male students noticed my body and the teacher asked me what had happened and I told him.  See back in those days it was acceptable to beat your children.  The humiliation I recieved from the other kids was overwhelming to me.  As years passed I became a drug addict and an alcoholic at 17 years of age.  I went into the service right out of high school to escape satans grasp.  But as I found out being able to travel all over the world my one pot habit became a full blown drug habit.  I used every drug conceivable.  When I got out of the navy I came back to my home town.  I still had a drug habit but no job so I began to steal to support my habit.  I did this for a couple of years until I was caught.  I spent a short time in the big house and realized this is not the place for me and I have stayed out of trouble since.  Because I decided to work to support my drug and alcohol habit.  My father was very abusive to me and my mother.  And in 1997 my mother died, I know that she is in a better place.  Last year my stepfather was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease.  His short term memory is pretty much gone and now his long term memory is starting to be effected.  I became a Christian a little over a year ago.  And when I found out that he had Alzheimer's God spoke to me and said that I needed to forgive my stepfather for what he did to me.  I did nothing to hurt him.  So for the past year my family and I have been visiting him on a regular basis and we enjoy it.  His daughter lives only about 150 miles away yet she hardly visits him.  There is only one of my stepfathers friends that come to see him other than my family seeing him he is a very lonely man.  So as Christians we must forgive others in order for God to forgive us.  I enjoy my walk with Christ and make him the center of my life.  Life is good when we walk according to the way God wants it to be.  Yes it can hard, but I would never choose to go back to the way I was once I have stepped into Gods light.

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Fellow artists (or otherwise 'artistic ministers') and ALL Christian friends-- are you frustrated with where you are? Wondering why God hasn't let you do ________ or go _________ or reach _______ number of people?  I face (we ALL face) the same frustrations and questions! 

Has your HEART been broken, and grief overtaken you?  Where is God?  Does He see?  Does He CARE!?  I want my OWN pain and grief to be used for  HIS glory, and therefore want you to HEAR this interview that I did last month with www.RiversideCountry.ca , a Christian radio show produced in New Brunswick, Canada, by Producer and show host, Jason Farris.  God certainly directed him which part of the (edited) telephone conversation I had with him, to bring this succinct message of our loving God to YOU today-- and to ME!!  God is SO FAITHFUL and AMAZING and LOVING to do that!  I pray it encourages you!! 

Here it is for High-speed listeners:  http://www.riversidecountry.ca/clips/becky_wright_hi.m3u
Here it is for Dial-up listeners:  http://www.riversidecountry.ca/clips/becky_wright_lo.m3u

"No pain is wasted when it's in the Master's hands."  HELP ME SPREAD the Word-- HIS WORD and His hope!!  I need your VOTE by May 15th for the Female Horizon Award!!  www.beckywrightsongs.com  THANK YOU!!!  May He be FOREVER GLORIFIED!!!  His servant, your sister, Becky Wright

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Almost seven years ago I met someone who changed my life forever. In some ways she really hurt my life, what i did and who i was, but she eventually led me to who i am today, a devoted child of God. She taught me to do something when i was ten years old that i'll never forget, sexual immorality. She was three years older than i so i looked up to her and trusted the things that she said i should be able to do. So there i was, ten and a half and doing things no one should ever do. I went on like that for two years, addicted. meanwhile the summer after we met she brought me to Spencer Lake Youth Camp, an amazing place where many kids find God each summer. I liked it there, but being so young, i didn't really get the whole idea of giving yourself to God, and being wholely his. So i went just because but had an awsome time. the next summer i couldn't go, but the summer i was twelve i went again. I realized there that God was definately something i need to think about. But i kept on doing that horrifying sin. I didn't realize how wrong it was. But i lived the lie until my freshman year in high school, when i told myself that i needed to stop, not just for me, but for God. The summer after my freshman year i was at camp for the fourth time. I gave my self to Christ, and haven't been the same since. It took awhile for me to quit the addiction, I tried it on my own, but found out that i needed Gods help, so i started seeking him and praying. I have now been "clean" for just over two years, and God has given me thatt amazing chance to help my beloved friend get over the same sin. Ever since the moment i chose God and life my mind set and being has been forever changed, and i never am going back. thank you God, I love you.

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Hello, my name is Sarah.

My life was a hard life. I grew up in a single parent family. My mother being a drug addict and an alcoholic was pretty hard on my life. I have been homeless, sexually abused many times, without food and moving houses many times in my life. I was like an average teenage girl in high school. Partying, drinking, doing drugs and having many boyfriends. I thought this was my only source of happiness, then I was proved wrong.

I moved out of my house with my mother into foster care when I was 16 years old. I met a guy on the internet who was Christian, we met in person and he would pick me up to take me to church with him. This went on for a few months. Then eventually I got saved (broke all my music cds, stopped swearing, stopped dating guys, stopped drinking, lost a lot of friends and got baptised) and then my foster mom kicked me out and I moved into another home an hour away. I was living with a married couple from the church I was brought to. I lived there for a year or so and got a job. Then I met a wonderful guy on the internet, again and I really enjoyed his company.

The only catch is that he lived in Australia. I really like this guy and I was so excited everytime I talked to him. Then he offered to fly me over there to see him. I went and I fell in love with him.

Now I am living in Australia with my boyfriends family. I attend University in Sydney. I am going to marry my boyfriend in a few years. I am activily involved in my church, singing etc. I have NOW been Christian for 3 years and still going. I couldnt be happier. God has done so many wonderful things in my life and I could not imagine my life without him. I could go on forever but that would take too long.

At the end of the day, God can change anyones heart and life. God loves each and every one of us with all that He is, He gave his son to us to die in our place so that we may live. Not only live but have eternal life. God is good all the time. Just trust!

Sarah - Australia

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Hi,
I was lost now I am found. It has been through the Grace of God. I used drugs from eighteen until I was thirty one. All my relationships were all about drugs and everything else that comes along with that kind of behavior.
I have been sober now nineteen years and have a eighteen
year old son who I raised all by my self and as a christian.
It was god's grace which makes salvation possible .God accepts us by his grace. God's grace gave me hope. Now that I just turned fifty years old I feel like God has given me a whole new life.
I enjoy sharing my experience ,strength ,hope with others and how God has changed my life.

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Hi.

Let me start off by saying that I overcame self-injury over 10 years ago, just shortly after turning my heart and life over to Jesus. When I harmed myself, I began with hitting and ripping out my hair, and years later progressed to where I cut my arms and legs. On two separate occasions I burned myself while on medication and under psychiatric care. Amongst hundreds of scars from cutting, I have 2 large scars (4 to 5” long and 2” to 3” wide) from 3rd degree burns. Since being healed and overcoming I created a self-help website, End All The Pain! (endallthepain.com) as a way to offer hope and encouragement to those struggling with a variety of challenges in life.

Since I have your attention, I would like to take the opportunity tell you a little about my new organization, Launching Point, Inc. Launching Point is a self-injury support and resource center, which is the only of its kind on the east coast. I realize you are familiar with self-injury, that it is self-inflicted violence such as punching, cutting, burning, and hair pulling, along with other types of harm, however, I enclosed a brochure for you. Launching Point offers assistance, support groups and a variety of resources to those who self-injure and was formed to offer services and support to those that self-injure as well as offer assistance to those supporting a loved one.

In May of 2004 I had my first book published; No More Pain! Breaking the Silence of Self-Injury, which I truly believe will shed some light to this misunderstood topic.

My anticipation for every person who hears my story is that he/she knows that he/she can be free of internal turmoil and get through any hardship or difficult time in his or her life! My hopes are that through sharing what I have been through it will help someone overcome whatever they are struggling with in their life, as nothing is hopeless!

Blessings to all.

Warm Regards,

Vicki

www.LaunchingPoint.org

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hiii...i jusr found this website this morning..well...i came from an islamic country at southeast asia,Malaysia...well not much to say..but live in a country full of muslims...is really hard especially when u the only one who receive god in ur family..my family,they dont believe god..and this has make my relatoinship with my family became worse..they hate me..and sometimes,my sister got angry with me,sha said IT IS NOT GOD who created her...and,i always saw my mom and dad got into a fight..i was just 6 years old..at that time,i didnt know who god is..i never go to church..until one day in the year 2000,i was 12 at that time...i went to church..alone..i feel peace in my heart...until now..im 19 years old..still im going to church alone..i went to high school and i dont have lots of friend..then i met with someone and he ruin my life...i was 15 and he was17...we become a couple 4 a few months,then i realize that he is not a good person,he try to rape me..then...i left him..lots of thing happened to me that i almost kill myself...thank God...4 saving me...from the darkness...He save me and he never feel tired of it...he`s there when i weak..he`s there when im almost fall...thank god 4 being my strength...thanks god...i love u god....

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I am unable to have children, and when I was younger I blamed God because I thought I was born useless. When i was in my mid to late teens I would self inflict pain on myself, I remember one night i took my guitar and just started to bash it against my leg as hard as i could because I wanted to die so bad, then in the middle of doing this my telephone rang once, i picked it up and nobody was on the other line, I know now that God was with me, because when I hung the phone up I grabbed my Bible and started reading it, and a sense of relief fell over my body. Since then I got baptized and joined a church and I am going to Great Lakes Christian College in the fall to study music and youth ministry. What is best of all is that I had a dream that I had went to Heaven and i saw my great aunts who had passed away and there was a little boy with them, I asked them who he was and they told me that he was my twin brother, and i burst into tears, I didnt tell anyone about my dream and a few months later my mom went to the doctor and they asked her if i could have kids because they found something wrong with her ((it wasnt a serious thing) but the doctor told her that what was wrong with her could have caused improper reproduction and that there was evidence that she was pregnant with twins!!! That proved to me that God is so real and that if anything I hope whoever reads this, young or old, will believe that this is real and that God is very much active!!!!

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Hey whats up! I just found this site and i think its great! I grew up in church and accepted Christ at an early age, but since I was so young there wasn t much of a change in my life because i had not been exposed to the world yet. So because of this i ve douted my salvation throughout my life. But I learned that when I messed up I always felt bad about it. And when I was 12 I responded to the call of God to preach. But I fell away from God and at the age of 14 I got involved with this girl. I loved this girl, even to the point of puting her before God. We dated for nearly 3 years straight, no breakups or breaks, nearly 3 years straight. But like my title says God knows best. She broke up with me a couple a weeks before our three year annaversy. I was crushed, I went into depression and didn t eat. But God pulled me through. And just a couple of weeks ago I redicated my call to God's work for my life and I am living for God!

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i wasn't tight with God..i went to church and things like that..but once i wanted to test Him...even thought...it's probably not the best thing to do..and i  asked him "God, help me find this radio station." and a few hours later i was walking with my dog when a bus pulled up next to me and on the side of the bus was an advertisement for that radio station....little freaky but true..after that i have been really good, my mom said my attitude has changed and i love to go to church because i get something out of it now.

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God is good to me and my famliy. He has brought us up in the right way. We are a prechers famliy, so the devel trys to bring us down useing everything.My famliy went through a hard time when we pastered a church in kingston ok. That was the last church we pastered, after that my dad stoped pastering for two years, that was so hard. Then my mom and dad started driving truck. My famliy sliped away from God. We just started to get back with god, we were doing good and my sister started falling from god. We thought we were going to lose her but we started to fast and pray and we are now starting to see a change in her. I prayed and fasted for her and for my dad to get a job for he will be home more often. He got that job, my sister is comeing around and my famliy is back with God,almost... but i thingk God for what he has done for us. Ever sence i gave my heart bact to the lord i have never been the same and i thingk god because i wont to do more for him. so keep my family in your prayer i you would.               ps. klove has the best music.

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Well lets see, I had tryed to go to church every Wednesday and Sunday whether my parents went or not. I switched churches a thousand times. I've been to many different denominational churches, including Nazerine, First Baptist, Assembly, Harvest Time, Evangel Temple, and so many others. This did not sway the way I felt about my God, though some preachers I encountered bashed other denominational ways. Before church was an on and off thing for me, but I have since created a home for myself at 180. And since I have really grown in my faith. I remember having to go to my Aunts summers and stay. She always had my cousins, my brothers, and I hold hands every morning and pray. That is one thing I think that helped me to be the person I am today. I also used to have problems with my dad, but then I realized that the only father I need to worry about is the one above. I have alot to thank God for and I try to do that every chance I get.

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I grew up pretty much like your average only child: spoiled. I had basically everything I had ever wanted, but it wasn't enough. I had one of those "God shaped holes" that you often hear of. My parents fought everyday of the week, with each other and with me. By the time I was nine, they had reached their breaking point. One night they went to a party which involved alcohol and they both got drunk. They physically fought and my dad was arrested for domestic violence. They eventually divorced and got a restraining order from each other, which was hard on me. I got caught up the world and got involved with the stereotypical bad kids at school that did all the drugs and alcohol and the partying. On my thirteenth birthday I seriously considered suicide. I couldn't take anymore of the court battles, my step mom and sister, the fighting...I wanted out. Luckily on my way home from school a lady saw me and invited me to church. She somehow convinced me to go to her Seventh-day Adventist church, where I later accepted Christ and was baptized. I was still pretty messed up though and I wasn't finding what I needed there but I knew I needed God. I revisited a church across town where I was taken on a date once. The atmosphere and all the people truly changed my life. They showed me the grace of God and the forgiveness of Christ and helped me through all the stuff I had battled as a kid. Now as a teenager, I'm living one life: for Christ.

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One certain night a final push from Hell was felt like never before in my life. You see, I am a sports coach who loved competition!! The team I was coaching had just won another Championship. As I drove away ,the joy of a win was being replaced with loneliness,and despair!! A few days went by, but nothing got better. Loneliness, and despair turned into very serious thoughts of SUICIDE!!! Satan kept pushing my rewind button of Divorce , losing my kids ,and sin I had committed!! The thoughts of buying a gun, overdose,and cutting my veins,ran rapid in my head.I even dared God 2 KILL me!! Yet through those threats 2 God ,I BELIEVE he heard my deep cry 4 help!! You c I wanted 2 c my earthly hero one last time,before I killed myself.(my mom) She seen my despair,and her response 2 me,was like words from God! She said,I am here 4 U always,and U r never alone!! I recalled God had said the same thing,in his word.I will never leave U nor Forsake U!! You C it was time 2 give God all my heart, and not half of me.As I gave GOD all my heart his presence fully started 2 change my whole being.You C the new me hates the old me ,now. The key was 2 give God all!! Not 1 knee ,but all of me bowing 2 my creator who never gave up on me!God has restored me and my kids relationship!! And has given me a great God fearing woman, my wife!! All I had 2 do was let him B THE CAPTAIN ,and now he directs me fully with his presence living in me.( THE HOLY SPIRIT )      THANK YOU LORD FOR NEVER GIVING UP ON ME ,WHERE OTHERS HAD!! NEVER LET ME GO !! TO YOUR HONOR AND GLORY  4 DYING 4 ME,WHEN I DID NOT DESERVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!

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If someone you loved with all your heart left and you, suddenly, realized that it was because Satan had slipped in unaware, how would you feel?
Lonelier than you can imagine. That's what happened to me and it turned me around. I rededicated my life completely to Christ and I was surprised but thrilled when I felt his call in return. He called me to preach and I accepted without question. With acceptance came peace and a filling presence that makes life so much better, though loneliness is still there.
He has given me my reason for life and he accepts me as I am, with all the flaws I have, most are now gone too. He's working on the rest.
I wait on him to answer the many prayers for a miracle because that is what it will take to reunite.
I will wait on him because HE CAN.
I pray that no one else has to have this happen before they realize when Satan is working in their lives.
May God guide each of you to his joy which fills you and gives you real hope.
In Christ,
Claud

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