I found myself somewhat discouraged in my heartache and asking God how such things happen among his people... in the midst of his children, the livingroom of his house. My thoughts wandered as to a reason why we should even care about trying to remain connected with Church per se'.  I didn't mean any of it... I was thinking in my humanity and my weakness and my heartache... my lack of faith and my sin actually.

 ... because I know the God whom I serve. I know better... I wasn't really dwelling on it, but it was rolling around in the back of my thoughts. Perhaps it is the enemy that tempts us to embrace such thoughts, to allow discouragement to take up residence and to weigh us down so that we tire in doing good. I was scrolling thru unexplored territory of the myccm site and ran across the myRSS page. I was scanning the topics, which were numerous tho I didn't really feel like it. Suddenly I saw several passages of Scripture at the end of the page and passed over them to scroll all the way back up to the top.

This will sound strange but I felt convicted to go back to them... actually convicted. And I felt as though the Lord spoke so clearly to my heart to go back and read them because there was something he wanted to say to me. I don't know if you have conversations with the Lord like that, but we often talk just as casually as I'm discussing/debating with my teens or my husband.

So I scrolled all the way back down to the verses and told the Lord that I just spent the entire morning praying online, and didn't really want to read all of them. But he continued to press me, and even said there is something buried (not in the beginning) that I have put there for you today. So I gave him my attention, with little zeal I must admit, and commenced reading the three verses posted. (I know, I know, three verses is nothing...).

Even as I was reading them, he was speaking right in my ear saying... "go on read, keep reading, even though I know you got nothing from those two I like your obedience... but change your attitude for me..." so I read on and rebuked my flesh and laziness... and wonder of wonders... the third and final verse, the very last one jumped from the screen straight into my heart...

“As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him.” Psalm 18:30

God knew it would take a walk thru those first two verses because I was dragging my feet and my heart and hearing only the *wah wah wah* of Charlie Brown's teacher. He knew it would take me until the third verse before I changed my attitude and was really paying attention and hearing what he was saying. He wasn't speaking the first or second verse to me at that moment. He placed it third, because he knows me better than I know myself, and he is patient with me despite my ugliness and imperfections. Soooo many lessons to be learned in that, but for now I gotta go back to that verse.

“As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him.” Psalm 18:30

yes, there is yuck and junk in this world and in the church. Yes, people are going to sin and horrible things will happen to good people, but that is not who God is. His people, his church represent him, but we are not God. Our ways are influenced and led by him... but our ways are still flawed even in that... like dragging yourself along when God is trying to take you somewhere and to help you with something you are struggling with (... I can't imagine anyone doing that *whistles nervously*)

God remains God. He is consistent in his ways. Everything he does and everything he says in his Word remains Truth and remains Good and should remain our goal. It doesn't matter what evil things the person in the foxhole is doing next to us. We can't throw down our weapon, climb out of that place of protection, and march our little pouty self (tho sometimes justified in our pouting and our tears and our anger) off somewhere else.

God said fight from the foxhole. He said as long as you fight from that place, you will remain in his Truth, his command, his plan to get to that place of victory. You jump up in the heat of the battle and your gonna end up with a bullet thru your helmet and firery darts pin-cushioning your back. There are people in the foxhole, sometimes faithful, sometimes committed... and sometimes not. But God remains faithful and right and wise. Don't give up on the plan, don't label it as unreliable, just because some choose to not follow it or to try and corrupt it. God will deal with them. Pray. Intercede so that the evil committed will be undone and so that all things will work together for good to them that love the Lord.

He is our shield, our refuge... and he says that the church is our foxhole. So no matter how the war may rage, or how many mortars make their way into your position/domain remain faithful, remain committed, don't duck and run. Fight close quarters if necessary, but fight according to Ephesians 6, praying in the Spirit always... and don't give the enemy an inch. God says he can't have it. You've been called and assigned and empowered and placed there to tell him so.

Father hear our request and grant our prayers according to your wisdom and your mercy...

I bind every spirit of discouragement attacking the people of God in the name of Jesus. I render you powerless before God, in the midst of the congregation, and in every thing that God has given us authority over. All power belongs to Jesus Christ in heaven and in earth, and we have been sent to declare that Truth. We agree together that every spirit of hell must be silent among the strategic positions/domain of the true Church, we resist the chaos and sin and discouragement and every evil work that you are trying to plant. And we command you to flee from the people of God. In the name of Jesus.

We loose the Holy Spirit to work every good thing in our congregations, to restore holiness and the Truth of God, to convict the hearts and minds of every soul that enters into our midst, to draw all people to the love of God and to reflect his integrity and his character. Father, let holiness and kindness and boldness return to your church, in the name of Jesus. For your glory and none other. Thank you Father Son and Spirit. Amen.