Hi I'm new to the community and hope that your prayers will be answered. Without telling you my life story (that I will put on my blog) I live with a diagnosis of major depressive disorder and everyday seems to be a struggle but lately more so. Not sure why - physically my "cousin" came to town for two weeks instead of the normal one and then I have been experiencing financial troubles for the past month with no end in sight. I am a single mother whose daughter is being raised by my mother (not my choice) and I havent seen my child in about 3 weeks. Lately it seems life itself is such a struggle that I'm not sure is worth the fight. I have no desire to burn in hell for all eternity but this neverending hell on earth seems almost worse. So yes I have contemplated suicide - I'm not a danger yet or I would check myself into the nearest hospital but the pain in my emotions is becoming physical and it is getting harder to cope. What I begging for is prayer that the Lord sees me through this "valley" of darkness as i yearn for warmth of the sun.
I'm praying for you, May God Bless You! I hope things brighten up for you really soon, Just have faith that you'll be out of this valley of darkness soon, I can't wait to hear an update saying things are much better, I believe it's possible when God intervenes.
Thank you, I believe in the power of prayer and I feel that there are people praying for me now. It may seem strange but I had an encounter today that makes me believe God was telling me yet again he was with me. It was a really simple thing but out of nowhere a guy shows up to help me carry a box I was struggling with and when I turned to thank him a second time he was gone - I looked inside all the cars around me and he was no where to be found like he was never there. Maybe I just want to believe it was more than it was but I still realize God is with me and sees me struggling even when I can't see him. I just wish I didn't feel so alone even though I know in my head that I'm not.
God CAN and WILL heal you if you seek His help, which you obviuosly are. He loves you with all of His heart which is pretty big!) and He died so that you won't have to. He knows how you feel, if anyone! I'll definitely pray for you. God bless you!
oh my dear sister i will pray for you that you feel and know his comfort is there for you. i myself thought about suicide. God got me through it. at times now i dont feel his presents be i know he is there. sometimes he lets us not feel his presents to let us know that our feelings and spiritual are the same. i can not say i have been there since i havent, but keep holding on to Jesus. he is there and when the time comes you will be glad you did. it is hard to hear just hold and hold on the Jesus when you are in such pain that i a can say we've all experience that kind of pain. i will pray that you will know and take comfort that God is right next to you. Tell him how you feel, he knows, but he wants you to tell him and talk to him. tell him that you are sad and hurt and broken, and let him hold you.
NO LINK HERE
Posted by: Angelheartsong on July 27, 2007 9:42PM EST
Hi, I dont know what you are going through physically but spiritually I understand. I know the situation looks and feels bad but just know that your child still loves you and is waiting for a chance for you to be together again. My Mom has problems, sry not my place to say, and I hope one day we can have a good relationship again. But she needs to hold the hand of God first and take baby steps and sounds like so do you. What I am getting her to do is connect with a church study group. For you try looking up churches online or look in the phone book for a big one that has outreach programs and study classes so that someone will be right there with you to help and guide. I am joining one for Singles and then others for how to lead a God centered life. So far just the welcome and love from the people has helped, especially knowing it comes from God and Jesus. My church at least it will be mine, offers such things as someone to take you to doctors appointments and get your groceries for you. There is help out there. Just ask. I am horribly shy so I used the phone and internet at first. I pray that this helps. God Bless you!!
